We went ring-shopping not long after we were engaged. This was a comedy worthy of a sitcom: my taste in jewelry tends toward small, elegant, understated. The giant freaking rocks they hauled out not only cost more than our combined salaries, but I think they could be used as lethal weapons for hand combat. How do you type with four pounds of rock on your finger?
The jewelers were perplexed by me, as I kept saying, "Do you have anything smaller?" At one store, I started the conversation with, "What's the smallest diamond you have?" At another store, they cracked a joke with us after I kept looking for smaller rings: they suggested that I might shop at Victoria's Secret for a present for Jimmy, and they'll deal directly with Jimmy on the ring. I took it in the spirit it was intended and laughed my ass off; Jimmy was less amused, feeling like they were dismissing me. In many ways, he's more of a feminist than I am, though he would probably protest that statement.
At another jeweler, I was trying to find lower-cost rings and the saleslady leaned over with a conspiratorial wink: "Oh honey, let him spend a little money on you. You're worth it." Yeah, lady: I might be worth my weight in diamonds, but we can't freaking afford them. I couldn't live with myself walking around with a $5,000 rock on my hand; hell, that's a used car! That's a semester of college tuition! That's seven months' rent!
And the fact is, I don't really like diamonds. I mean, they're okay, but they're kind of boring. I think diamonds work best as accents for other, more interesting stones. So I was really looking at settings more than the rock itself. And we weren't seriously looking at first, mind you; Jimmy was laid off not long after we got engaged, so we knew buying rings even on layaway would have to wait until he was re-employed.
One day in January, we had concluded another session - this time at Jared Jewelers. It was more successful than most, as we'd narrowed down to two choices for Jimmy's ring, but I had yet to find anything affordable that I really liked. We were actually on our way out when I stopped at the sapphire display; dark blue is my favorite color.
There it was. A glorious natural sapphire cut in an oval shape, with a delicate white-gold setting and two tiny accent diamonds. The scrollwork on the sides seemed to be nearly in an infinity symbol. That's a very important symbol for us. In the early months of our relationship, we got lost on the back roads of Tennessee, and joked about crossing over into another dimension. The plot we came up with as we wandered the hillsides turned into my novella Infinity, in which the infinity symbol is vitally important. We had already decided we would engrave infinity symbols inside our rings, and here was an engagement ring with the symbol already there!
I wrote down the ring's SKU number, but in my mind it was already decided. No other ring we saw was anywhere near as beautiful. And there's no law that says your ring has to be a diamond; in fact, sapphire engagement rings are traditional in England. Jimmy was quite pleased, not only that we'd finally found a ring I liked, but it was about half the cost of a diamond ring. I was pleased, because it seemed to be uniquely mine.
Months went by. I eventually paid off his ring, which is currently in a box awaiting the wedding. It is a beautiful and intricate quasi-Celtic design, and made out of a durable stainless steel, which meant I got the better deal on the price, let me tell you.
Jimmy paid on my ring for most of the year. Then a few weeks ago, we stopped by the store to make a payment and discovered it had gone on sale. With that discount, he was able to pay off the whole amount. We picked up the resized ring two days later.
But he couldn't just put it on my finger; oh no! There are two proposals in this modern world: the one where you find out what she's going to say, and the one with the ring. So I told him that if he was going to ask me again, he'd have to top the Castle.
Let me be clear: I was kidding. Short of winning the lottery and whisking me away to Nantucket, there's no way to top the Castle. Hell, the miniaturized model of the Castle is now on my wish list, because of that special moment. I was also kidding when I said maybe I'd have a different answer this time, like, "Can I have a few days to think about it?" He said that would be mean. I replied, "Hi, have we met?"
That Sunday, he managed to top the Castle.
We had a guest priest serving at our church, and Jimmy was scheduled to read the lessons. After the passing of the peace, the priest asked if there were announcements. Then he said, "Jimmy has one."
I blinked. Twice. What announcement would Jimmy have? Then I saw him heading down from the altar to where I was sitting in the pews, and I figured it out. "Are you kidding?" I asked, blushing terribly. He smiled and drew me out into the aisle.
Because Jimmy is Jimmy, he was still shaking and emotional as he told me before the entire parish how important I was to him and how much he loved me. He went down to one knee and said, "So I am asking you again, to please be my wife and allow me to be your husband."
I wish I could have thought of something better to say than, "Yes." I was totally unprepared, and I shouldn't have been; I should have known that ring was burning a hole in his pocket. I should have said something profound that we would always remember.
But I couldn't think of anything beautiful or sweet or funny. I just said, "Yes," and he put the ring on my finger and kissed me and the whole church applauded.
As Jimmy went back to the altar, the priest said, "Good thing she said yes!" Jimmy replied, "Amen!" and everyone laughed. The ladies sitting around me all clustered to look at the ring, and I think I turned about six shades of red. They asked if I'd known what he was up to, and of course I hadn't a clue. Later I told him that it really was a good thing I said yes; if I'd said anything else, I think there would have been seventy hymnals flying at my head. Ow!
It was a wonderful moment, and yes, it tops the Castle. God trumps all, and sharing that moment with our church family was a wonderful corollary to sharing the original proposal with our family-of-blood. My only regret was that Jimmy's kids couldn't be there for either moment, but I know they will be with us when we (finally) marry, and that's the most important part.
And now I wear the most beautiful ring in the world, placed there by my fiance. Thank you, love.
